WE KNOW, 2020 is coming to an end.
If your social media feed looks anything like mine, then it's full of, "Things to leave behind in 2020" type of posts.
Usually, I am not a fan of New Years Resolutions. If you want to make a change for yourself, then make the change no matter the time of year.
And if you want to make a change for yourself, make it because you deserve the change, not because of societal norms that shame you into thinking you need to reinvent parts of yourself every New Year.
That said, these posts have got me thinking and I can get down with the idea of releasing whatever no longer serves me in order to make room for new higher vibes to come in.
So, here I am with my own list of what I'm ready to leave behind in 2020.
🔥The idea that I should "be" anyone or anything. I too often find myself feeling annoyed that I haven't fully embodied who I think I should be, or am hard on myself if I don't always naturally feel the contentment, peace, and fulfillment I seek in my life.
I want so badly to be something other than what I am in that moment instead of just giving myself room to be. Moving forward, I am choosing to give myself permission to feel whatever I feel, and to just be, no expectations attached.
🔥The word Should. Really, it's a weird and annoying word when you think about it. Should. Eck.
The word should implies a certain degree of judgment. I should do this thing I am not currently doing. What if I replace every should with I choose to? The energy of the sentence or statement completely changes.
In reality, our life is comprised of many choices. We all have the free will and ability to choose where we dedicate our time and energy. We can relish in this choice and recognize it's all ours to make. Isn't that more fun than should?
🔥Self-judgment. Goooooood lawd, am I ready to leave behind the tiny voice in my mind that whispers, "you're not good enough," and not-so-subtly compares me to others, but... guess what? That isn't really an achievable goal.
I have done a lot of work to release my own judgments, yet that tiny judge-y voice still perks up in my mind.
Rather than (ahem) judging my own self-judgment (quite the pickle I've gotten myself in here), moving forward I choose to acknowledge that letting go of old patterns and ways of being is a process.
I might never completely dispel the judge-y voice in my mind and that's okay. The awareness I now have around my self-judgement means I can make the decision to acknowledge and release the judgment, rather than getting swept away by it. That is a win.
🔥My protective walls. There is a part of me that is scared of being hurt by others. I don't want to leave this part of me behind--she is a part of me and I am working towards fully accepting all parts of myself.
I do want to listen to and love this part of me, and work towards taking down the walls she's built around my heart. Moving forward, I choose to acknowledge and love the part of me that feels scared, then openly give and receive love despite feeling scared.
✍🏼Write it out! Journaling is one of my go-to methods to release and better understand what's going on underneath the surface of my mind. So, what are you ready to leave behind in 2020? I invite you to write out your answers. Once you're done, safely burn the paper and envision yourself letting go of these things along with the rising smoke.